The Power of Positivity: How to Bounce Back Stronger from Setbacks

Power of Positivity: How to Bounce Back Stronger from Setbacks

Kelly Kennedy: Welcome to episode 165 of the Business Development Podcast. And today we're here to pump you up. We're talking positivity and how picking yourself up and dusting yourself off is the secret to long term success. Stick with us. You are not going to want to miss this episode.

Intro: The Great Mark Cuban once said business happens over years and years.

Value is measured in the total upside of a business relationship, not by how much you squeezed out in any one deal. And we couldn't agree more. This is the business development podcast based in Edmonton, Alberta, Canada, and broadcasting to the world. You'll get expert business development, advice, tips, and experiences, and you'll hear interviews with business owners.

CEOs and business development reps. You'll get actionable advice on how to grow business. Brought to you by capital business development, capitalbd.ca. Let's do it. Welcome to the business development podcast, and now your expert host, Kelly Kennedy.

Kelly Kennedy: Hello, welcome to episode 165 of the business development podcast. My name is Kelly and it is a pleasure to be on with you today.

Today, we want to chat all about the power of positivity. And specifically the power of remaining positive after a challenging event because you know what guys we've all been there. I've ridden the emotional entrepreneurial rollercoaster that is business. That is business development and I totally, totally get it guys.

And there have been some things that I've talked about in this show before. That have helped me along the way that have helped me recover from those inevitably challenging speed bumps. And I know a lot of you guys are afraid right now. I get it. And, you know, I'm hearing from you guys all the time and you're telling me, Kelly, you know, I'm afraid we're in recession.

Things are getting harder and harder. Closing business is getting harder and it is taking an emotional toll on me. And guys, I totally, totally feel for you. I totally understand. I know how devastating it can feel when you are losing proposal after proposal after proposal. And guys, we're going to get into that today.

Cause I'm with you. I totally understand. Been there, done that, got five t shirts. I really have guys I've been through the ringer, but I'll tell you what. Positivity and a positive outlook has always got me out the other side. And there is no replacement really for your ability to stay positive, to turn the other cheek, to see the positive in a situation.

learn a lesson and move on. There really is no replacement for this. And if you look at the best entrepreneurs, the people that have been through it and through it and through it, I'll tell you one thing they all have in common, their ability to bounce back their ability to take a lickin and keep on ticking guys.

It is important. It is powerful. And we are going to get right into that today, guys. But before we do I want to give you guys a show update. We are sitting at 212, 000 downloads. We're sitting at 2, 603 Apple and podcast subscribers. You guys are amazing. That thing is growing quickly. And if you have not chosen to subscribe, I would appreciate it.

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I love that we are a worldwide audience. I think that's super, super cool. And we could not, and I could not do this show without your support. So I just want to say to all of our rockstar listeners around the world. You guys are amazing. Thank you so much for tuning in for making us a big show like around the world.

It is super, super cool. And it never ceases to amaze me when I see us popping up in, in Africa, in United Kingdom, in Australia, in Germany. My gosh, in Ireland, we are everywhere. It is so flipping cool. It is so flipping cool. And I just want to say guys to my international listeners, to my Canadian listeners, to my United States listeners, you guys are absolutely amazing.

We could not do this show without you, without your support. Thank you for telling your friends and family literally around the world could not do it without you. And so thank you so much. I appreciate that immensely. Community questions, guys. I don't think I've ever put out a community questions call.

That has gotten the response that my latest one has. So if you have not had a chance yet to submit community questions for September, anything you guys submit, we'll make sure it gets into October. So don't, don't feel bad if you're a little late on the community questions. We do need them. Send them on over to podcast@capitalbd.ca. That is podcast@capitalbd.ca shoot us any questions you guys have on podcasting, entrepreneurship, business development. I am your guy. I can't wait. Community Questions, guys, is one of my favorite things. And honest to God, if this show was just community questions, I would be cool with that. I really love community questions that much.

And so please do send me your community questions. Let me know how the show is affecting you. Let me know the change in your world, or if it has made an impact or if it got you that job, or if it's just changing the way you do business development. We appreciate that immensely. I love to hear from my listeners around the world.

And so please do shoot us a message on LinkedIn, on Instagram, wherever you guys are at. Let's have a conversation and I appreciate you and I love, love, love hearing from you. And one last thing before we launch into today's show, if you like this show and you need support, whether it be business development support, entrepreneurial support, you just have some questions, feel I have a totally rockstar one on one business development mastery coaching program.

It is three months guys. We do it literally in six sessions, not a ton of homework between those sessions, but ultimately it will change the way that you guys do business development and you grow your businesses forever. I make that promise to you. You will walk away from the business development mastery program a better business developer than you have ever been before. Bar none, no matter how long you've been in the industry, we are going to give you the tips, the tricks, the encouragement, the motivation and the process to totally kick ass at business development. And I can't wait to work with you. You guys can book your consultations.

through linkedin or through www. capitalbd. ca forward slash coaching head on over there book your consultation a one on one with me and let's have a conversation and guys even if you guys just come for the consultation there will be something in there for you i will make sure That you walk away with some nuggets of excellence.

All right, my goodness, let's just get into it. Remaining positive after a loss. Guys, I totally, totally love this one. I love this particular topic because my gosh, dude, I have had to remain positive after a lot of crappy losses. I'm straight, guys. I've had a Plenty of, of proposals go south of, of, you know, heck even on the show where sponsors fell through or whatever happened.

I had my hopes up. I was excited. And I had to fall over a cliff right onto my face, pick myself up, dust myself off and say, Kelly, it's all right. We're on to the next one. We're on to the next one. And guys, I don't know. I don't know what you want to call it. I am inherently good at picking my ass up off the ground, but I think all of you guys can be inherently good at picking your ass up off the ground.

It really is. a mindset. It really is a belief, a belief system, if you really want to call it that. A belief system that the right things are happening to you guys at the right times. But we're going to walk through some things today. We're going to walk through some steps, some ideas to hopefully Make the next time you guys fall on your face a little easier.

And I know, I know there's a lot of people out there. I've had a lot of people reach out to me saying, Hey, Kelly, I'm, I'm scared. I think we're entering a recession, you know, and I don't know, especially here in North America, guys, it's tough. It's tough out there. Inflation's through the roof. I don't know if last time you guys went to the grocery store, it feels like every time we go to the grocery store, we're spending a hundred bucks on nothing.

It's a, it's absolutely bonkers. Shrinkflation is real. Housing prices are through the roof guys. Oh my gosh. Let's just talk housing prices for a second. Me and Shelby are in the market for a house. And so we're actively out there right now, house hunting. And I think we might've found the one we'll see.

We'll see, but guys, it is scary in this market right now. You really have to want to move. You really have to want to make that jump and say, you know what? We're going to get the place. We're going to stay at a long time because guess what? If you're buying a house at, you know, seven, eight, 900, 000, you damn well better like it.

You damn well better plan to stay there for a while. So it has been a emotional roller coaster for me and Shelby. This has been a tough decision for us, but we're excited. We're going through it. We're we're hoping for the best, but understand all I'm saying guys is I'm right there with you. We're feeling the fears of this, this economy.

We're feeling the fears of this market, but you know what? You have to keep on living. You have to keep on going. I know it's scary. I know it's scary. I'm scared. Everybody's scared. But you know what? You have to keep on moving because the people who keep on moving come out the other side. You can't let the systems beat you guys.

You can't let them beat you down. You have to keep your head up. You have to keep optimistic. You have to keep saying, I can do this. I can come out the other side. I can book this meeting. I can close this deal. Because you really can, regardless of crap economy, regardless of the situation, guys. There are people out there making billions of dollars right now in this crap economy.

So understand, you can too. You can come out the other side of this. It really does come down to what you believe. And we're going to get into the power of beliefs today. But my gosh, what you believe really matters, cause what you tell yourself really matters, cause whether you can or you can't, you're right.

Whether you say you can, or whether you say you can't, you're right, and guys, we have a whole show on that one. It's true, it's true, and the reason that I say this, before we kick into today's episode, the reason that I say this is, when I was young, a young BD lad, a young BD lad, and I was working for a small inspection firm at the time, And the boss I worked for wanted me to get into some of the biggest oil and gas companies in Canada.

And I remember just looking at him saying, I can't do that. I can't do that. I don't even know where to start. I don't know how to do that. And I literally told myself that they were out of reach. I could not do that. I couldn't book a meeting with Cenovus or CNRL or Suncor guys. For those of you around the world, they're like some of the biggest oil and gas companies in Canada.

But I used to tell myself I could not do that. It was total bullshit. It was my own self limiting belief. Guys, I'm right there. Hands up. Self limiting beliefs. I'm full of them. I've been full of them. I am learning to work myself out of them. I still struggle with some of them. Here. How many of you out there say, I have to work hard to succeed.

I can only succeed through hard work. Guess what? That's a self limiting belief that you got from watching your parents kill themselves to make a buck. Seriously. I'm right there. I struggle with that one. Watched my dad. Watched my mom. Worked night shifts. Worked endless amounts of work for barely, barely getting by.

Barely getting by as a kid, guys. And so for me, it's funny because I was literally just talking to one of the sponsors of the show, Colin Harms, about I have to unlearn that. I have to literally work on myself and say, you know what, Kelly? There's a way to work smart, not hard. There's a way to succeed smartly, not by killing yourself.

I struggle with that, guys. I really do. I struggle with that limiting belief. But you know what? I'm working on it. I'm working on it. I own it. I know for a fact that's a problem that I struggle with, and I'm trying to find ways to unlearn the programming. And what I'm saying to you guys before we get into today, you too, you too.

You, too, can unlearn the programming. You, too, can change the way that you take on any situation. You can change the way you think about a situation. You can change the meaning of any situation you find yourself in. You can sit around with your head in the sand feeling sorry for yourself. where you can pick yourself up.

And guys, I have spent plenty of times on both sides. I've spent plenty of times sulking and feeling bad, and I've spent plenty of time picking myself, dusting myself off, and dealing with it. You know what situation worked out better for me every time? The one where I picked my ass up off the ground, dusted myself off, learned a lesson, and kept on truckin guys.

Every time, that situation has done me better than the time where I just stuck my head in the sand, felt sorry for myself, felt scared, and did nothing. That's, that's the recipe for disaster. The recipe for disaster is staying stuck. But if you can pick yourself up, dust yourself off, You will be okay.

Alright guys, let's acknowledge the elephant in the room for all of us. Losing sucks. Losing sucks. I hate losing. Said it a thousand times. On this show, guys, I hate losing. My hate for losing has actually made me successful because I try that much harder in order to make something happen. And once again.

The work hard, not smart. This is, this is where like, Oh my gosh, I've run myself into a wall because sometimes I'll, I'll try to not lose so badly, but then I'll kill myself trying to find a solution when maybe there was a smarter solution or a smarter way for me to handle it in the first place. This is where I am self struggling with my own belief system with working hard.

But understand. Most of us hate losing, and guys, it is completely okay to feel let down if you lose a proposal, a client, or anything else that mattered to you. Understand, first off, before we get into this whole thing, it is completely okay to feel like what the heck just happened to me to feel kicked when you're down to feel sad, to feel scared, to feel anxious, understand if you feel this way when something crappy happens, because you're like me and you pump something up and you get really excited and so ultimately when things don't go the way you want, you feel sad, you feel let down.

I'm right there with you. Hand, hand, two hands through the roof. You can't see it right now. I'm waving my hands in the air, guys. I am right there with you. I hate it. It puts me in a mood. It makes me sad. It makes me scared. It makes me anxious. It makes me a lot of feelings. Okay? But, understand, that is okay.

There is absolutely nothing wrong with feeling that way. Take your moment. Take your moment. It hurts. Losing a proposal sucks. Losing a client sucks. Losing anything you're passionate about sucks. That is okay. There's absolutely nothing wrong with that. Understand that business is challenging. People don't just throw money away.

And so it can be really hard. It can be really hard to close that deal you want. It can be really hard to build the value proposition that you want to build. And so understand I'm right there with you. I totally get it. I totally understand. The market is hard. You are going to have to work a little bit harder to close that deal.

You are going to have to show the value proposition. You might have to share some risk, guys. There's some stuff that is going to have to happen for you to be successful and understand that that is business. Business is challenging. People are not going to just throw money at you. That's not how the world works.

Okay. You have to earn the business. You have to provide real value. The thing you're doing has to actually help the world. And so if you're struggling to sell something, if you're struggling to close these deals, Before you do kind of go down this rabbit hole where you're like, I got it all worked out and I just need to keep on pumping.

It never hurts to take a look at your value proposition, guys. It never hurts to reevaluate and say, okay, are we sharing the risk with our client? Are we providing the best possible value? Are we charging a fair rate market rate? Remember guys, the market dictates the rate. You don't dictate the rate. The market decides what your product and service is worth.

Understand me. There's a lot of businesses that haven't figured this out. You know what happens to them? They die. Because people stop buying their product and service because they are not competitive. You do not dictate the price of your product and service. What somebody will pay for it dictates the price of your product and service.

So like, understand there are situations, especially when things are getting a little tougher out there, there are situations where you may have to sit down and renegotiate. There are situations where you may have to re evaluate the value proposition, either add value or reduce price or something along those lines to meet something that's going to work for your client.

But as long as you are providing value that your client wants, that your client sees as valuable, that helps their business either make money or save money, you will do okay. But you gotta figure out how to show the value to either make them money or save them money, guys. And I have a whole series on this.

If you want to go back, I have a series called Proposal Playbook. If you guys are struggling right now with closing deals, go back, check out Proposal Playbook. There's a four part series, I believe, and you will find it incredibly, incredibly helpful, okay? There are many factors out of your control, so let's just chat about that.

Some people will tell you everything is in your control. If something fails, it's all on you. Well, there might be something that's on you, but own only your part, okay? There is a buyer and a seller in every single interaction. There are two people or more in every single interaction for you guys.

Understand, own your part, own what you can do, but understand that no matter what you do, if you build the best proposal, you could build the best proposal ever made. Somebody could still reject the proposal. Somebody could still say, at this point, that doesn't work for me. Okay, guys, there are just situations that are out of your control, and you have to understand that.

Own what is in your control, learn a lesson, but recognize that there are a lot of factors that are out of your control, and no matter how much you try to control them, You will never be able to control them. And so understand some things you're not going to be able to change no matter how hard you try.

Clients can come and go at any time for any reason. We we end up in this, in this trap, don't we? This client trap. The client trap. It's like the parent trap. It's only for grown ups. The client trap. Anyways, you can end up in the client trap. What's the client trap? The client trap is We have the best client and they're never going anywhere.

We're going to give them everything. We're going to double down. We're going to triple down, actually. We're going to really just clobber this and say, this is what we're going to do 100%. They're never going anywhere. Guys, in oil and gas, this happened heavy, heavy, heavy pre 2015. Okay. 2015 came and I saw companies fold like I'd never seen before.

Why? They got, they got stuck in the client trap and the client trap no longer wanted to service those companies. They wanted to cut costs. And guess what? Those service companies, those support companies, they no longer made sense. And those relationships no longer made sense. And those companies had nowhere else to go.

They had nowhere else to go. And you know what happened? They died. They died. By like, hundreds and hundreds and hundreds, okay? 2015 was a clobbering for Alberta. But understand, they got stuck in the client trap. And so the client trap is, your client can go at any time for any reason. And so this being the case, you always need to make sure that you don't put all your eggs in one basket.

Find ways to service multiple clients across multiple industries. That way, at least you're protected if you lose one of your big clients, guys. Never stop hunting. Never stop opening the door to new relationships. Find a way. Find a way to make it work. Because over time, having a diversified client roster is only going to save your butt because clients will go.

At some point, they will go for whatever reason. One reason or another, they tend to always go. And you don't want to be stuck in the client trap. When that happens, clients can go for any reason at any time. So just understand that people are afraid about the economy right now. And you know, rightly so rightly.

So I'm not going to tell you that things are peachy out there. I get it. You know, everybody's pinching pennies because we are paying 150, 200. Every time we go to the grocery store, we're getting gouged on logistics and transportation. 60 to 80 cents more per liter. In Alberta, one of the cheapest places in Canada to get gas than we should due to stupid taxes.

So understand, I'm right there with you guys. I I totally get it. I totally get it. Things are tight. You have to make good decisions. Understand your clients are also trying to make good decisions. And so remember that, remember that, like, don't just, don't just throw your products and service out there and think that everybody can afford it because they probably cannot.

That doesn't mean you can't close the deal. Just understand it. In a challenging economy. It doesn't mean you can't succeed. Okay. It just means you have to look at your value proposition and you need to make something that makes sense. You need to create something that makes sense on both sides. A win win.

You need to create a win win value proposition for your clients, okay? There is a way forward through this. A lot of people will make it. A lot of people will make a fortune. Okay? There is a way through this. But understand, if you're afraid of the economy, don't, don't cower in a corner. Don't just shudder in and hope for the best with the clients you got.

Guys, you gotta double down, you gotta triple down. Right now is when you gotta be finding the most clients you've ever found. This is when you gotta be doing BD like you have never BD'd in your life. Because if you BD like crazy when things are challenging, and you keep that up, you are gonna absolutely kill it.

Not only are you gonna make it out the other side of any economic challenge, you are gonna come out the other side stronger than ever. and in a better position to take on new clients than any of your competition. Don't hunker down in a recession or in an economic downturn. Don't hide. Don't hide. Double down.

Double down. Book more meetings than you've ever done. Figure out how to create a value proposition that's going to knock down the door at your client. You do this right, you will come out the other side. It's kind of like buying stocks when they're low. If you can kill it on the BD in a downturn, you are going to come out the other side stronger than ever.

Not the time to fire your BD people, okay? Not the time. The time to probably hire two more, okay? That is the reality of any downturn. Don't hide the BD. Don't hunker down. Don't status quo. Grow, grow, aim to grow, because if you aim to grow during the economic downturn, you will come out the other side stronger and more powerful than ever, okay?

Guys, growth happens in the struggle. Growth happens in the struggle. Guys, I've never learned shit from succeeding. I have never learned shit from the things that just automatically won, okay? Where everything that I have learned in business development, in business, in entrepreneurship, in podcasting has been through the failures, okay?

Has been through the losses, has been through the, no, this doesn't work, Kelly. No, this, this sucks. This sounds horrible. This is just not working out. Those were the motivators for me to do better. Those were the motivators. Not, not when I killed it. Not when I closed the contract on the first proposal. Not when I put out the show and it just went perfectly.

Those were not the scenarios where I learned and grew. I grew in the losses and there are lessons in the losses. And not only that, I literally did a show with Steve Monk called lessons in the losses. It is a great, great episode, and you should definitely go back and check that out. But guys. Like Steve said, there are lessons in the losses.

Pain is a great motivator. Guys, it might be the best motivator. Let's get real. Think back in your life to the situations where you really grew as an individual. Was it when you killed it and won the tournament? Or was it when you were crying in the corner of your room? Wondering how your life was going to get better.

I guess for me, that was the situation, guys. It was in my, like, my breaks. It was in my, like, oh my gosh, I cannot live like this anymore. That my life changed. It really was. It was in the shittiest moments of my entire life. Where I grew the most. Where I made commitments to myself and held them. Where I, whatever, quit smoking.

Where I stopped acting like a jackass. Where I really committed myself to my business, to my podcast. To my partner, right? It's in those moments of just total destruction that you change as a person. Why would it be any different in your business? Why would it be any different in your business? Pain is the motivator.

As long as you are willing to change. to make that change. And guess what? Like any person at rock bottom, you gotta be willing to make the change. You gotta be willing to commit to a better future, to a better outcome, to harder work, whatever it may be. And guys, I don't want you to hit rock bottom. I really don't.

I want you to learn before you hit rock bottom. But guess what? If you're like me, That does tend to be where we learn. I've learned most of my lessons the hard way. For better, for worse. But guess what? I learned them. And I get better every single day. And does that mean that I don't have shitty days? Nope.

Had a shit had multiple shitty days in the last month. Let's just call it that. Had plenty of shitty days in the last month where I was feeling anxiety. Where I was feeling like, am I good enough? Can I even do this? Entrepreneurship is hard. Podcasting is hard. Keeping up to a schedule is hard. Closing, closing sponsors is hard.

Guys, I've been there. Not only have I been there, I'm there like multiple times a month, right there with you. But guess what? I learned. I learned something in each of those things, whether it be about me, whether it be about the business, whether it be about podcasting or closing sponsors, whatever it may be, I am learning all the time.

I am. Yeah. I'm in a business development expert till yesterday. Sure. But guys in entrepreneurship, I'm learning all the time. I'm four years into my entrepreneurship journey. I got a ton to learn. I got a ton to learn. There's a ton. I don't know about podcasting, even about entrepreneurship. There's things I'm still learning about business development from other experts, guys.

I'm learning all the time. And I am, I may be an expert till yesterday, but like I said guys, we're all experts until yesterday. Tomorrow's a new day. If we stop learning, we're dead. We're dead in the water. And so, I'm right there with you. You aren't alone. I'm learning. I'm struggling. I'm trying to get out the other side.

I'm taking the big risks, just like you guys. I'm a millennial. I'm scared shitless about the future. I totally get it. I totally get it. I'm right there. I'm a parent, and I'm scared about that. I'm right there. I'm doing my best just like each and every one of you but guess what you guys are killing it We're all killing it every day that we get up and we don't quit Is another step in the right direction is another step where growth happens in the struggle guys, I'm in the struggle with you, you must grow, you must grow, change has to happen, there's no way about it, change is going to happen, no matter how, how much we want it to not happen, I get it guys, I'm a guy, I hate change, I've, I've hated change for a long time, especially in my personal life or if my house or whatever it is, but guess what, change is inevitable. There is no way out but change. Life is change. And so at some point you have to say, Okay, I might not be a huge fan of change, but I need to get really great at handling change because it is happening whether you like it or not. Change is coming, guys. Change is coming. Your business is going to change.

You are going to change. Your life is going to change. Everything changes. That literally is the only constant in life, is that everything changes. And guys, you just gotta accept it, and look at the bright side, you really do, because life sucks if change is happening to you, and it just feels like life is happening to you, and you have no control over it.

Or you have a negative outlook over what's happening guys, kay? Life is happening, sure, but you get to choose how you interpret what is happening to you, okay? You can control how you respond. The best thing about life, the best thing about being you, and you may not know it right now, right? You might not, maybe we all know it.

We all know it inside. We know that we control our perception of things. We know that we control the meaning, but we can also feel like, oh, well, I want to just let life give us the meaning, guys and guys, life will give you the meaning. If you want life to give you the meaning, damn it, life will give you the meaning.

But guess what? That meaning is not going to be great. A lot of the time, it's going to feel like you're getting your ass kicked. Unfortunately, that is what, that is, that is what happens if you don't take control of the narrative. If you don't have a positive outlook, if you don't find a way to turn the cheek and look at the bright side of the situation, okay?

You get to choose. You get to choose whether it is a horrible thing or an opportunity. And guys, I choose opportunity. And there's been a lot of situations where it's felt like, Damn it, like I'm choosing opportunity here, but it didn't feel like it. I get it. But the more that you put yourself in that look for the opportunity, what's the pro?

What's the pro? I get it. There's always a con. There's a thousand cons if you want. Where's the pro? Find the pro. Find the win. Find the lesson. Find the way to do better. Find the way to not let this situation put you in a bad spot again. Okay? The more that you can look to find the positive outcome in your life, the better off you are going to be.

Okay? Your outlook will either screw you or save you. It really will. Your outlook is either going to screw you or save you. And so choose save. You really do. You get to choose. Choose to learn the lesson. Choose to turn the other cheek. Choose to look at the bright side. Choose to enact a lesson. Choose to do it a little different and see what happens then.

Find the positive outlook, guys. I can't tell you this, and I get it. I understand how hard this can be. I understand that in some situations, it can look so grim. It can look so impossibly crappy that it can feel impossible to see the other side, but let me tell you what. I have had those things happen so often to me, and the faster that you get up, the faster you succeed, okay?

You get to choose how long you're knocked down. Let's go back to the beginning. In the beginning, I acknowledged that it's okay to feel let down. It's okay to feel sad. It's okay to feel anxious. It's okay to feel scared. It is. 100%. Have your moment. I have plenty. I have plenty, plenty, plenty of my moments, but guess what?

I don't stay there. I don't embrace it. I don't hug it. I don't, I don't spend any more time there than I have to. And you know what? Sometimes I do have to spend a little more time. Sometimes it, it hurts a little more. Sometimes I'm feeling a little more discouraged than usual. But guess what? The great thing about, for whatever reason, my programming is the way it is, is that eventually.

A positive thing comes to my mind where it's like, you know what? That sucked. But this, this is the opportunity now, or that sucked. And I'm going to do this a little bit different and see what happens or that sucked, but I don't have to look at it that way. I can do better. I don't have to stay here. I can dust myself off and try again, guys.

And trust me, the sooner that you can pick yourself up, the faster you will succeed. Understand this, look at anybody. That you admire. Look at anybody who you're like, Oh my gosh, that person is killing it. Could be your idol on LinkedIn. Could be your family member. Could be a friend. Could be anybody who you look up to who is doing better than you.

Okay. You only see that, don't you? You only see the amazing. And guess what? That's all people can see about you. But guess what they don't see? They don't see the same thing you don't see. The thousand times that amazing person, that entrepreneur, that friend, that family member who's killing it, failed, fell on their ass, got knocked over, got disgraced, had to pick themselves off.

Maybe they went through bankruptcy and they had to come back. Guys, there's been a bankruptcy. Pulled themselves back, became multi millionaires, guys. It happens. It happens. You don't see that. You just see their success. You just see the great. And you know what, obviously we live in an Instagram filter kind of world, right?

Nobody's posting the shit. It's starting to happen. People are starting to be more real and posting real life crappy events on LinkedIn so you can see it's not just this gigantic beautiful picture. I'm trying to be one of them. The reality is there's lots of crap. There is nothing easy about running a business and a podcast and trying to be a good parent, partner, family member, growing in a world, fighting the same economic challenges, fighting the millennial challenges of our generation.

Guys, I get it. I get it. It's challenging. And you might only see the pretty. The pretty pictures that we put up, but the reality is, guys, for every single person you, you see out there who is absolutely killed it, understand they have overcome thousands of struggles. They may be fighting a personal horrific struggle right now, and you can't see it because they don't show it to the world because it's that scary.

And you know what? We got those. We all got those. We all got that stuff. That's so scary that we hide guys. I get it. I get it. Point is for every person you see out there. Who's killing it, who you admire, they are struggling too. They are struggling as well. They didn't just end up where they are at. They had to earn it just like you are going to have to earn it.

Okay. Compare yourself to you. That's what I'm getting at here. Compare yourself to you because you don't know what others have had to endure to get to their current success, okay? Just like you only know what's happened to you to get you to where you are today, you can't tell what other people have done to get there.

So, if you have to compare yourself to someone, I want you to compare yourself to you. Compare yourself to you five years ago, two years ago. One year ago, whatever, whatever your success level. I bet you, you will see that you are a lot further ahead than you were five years ago. You might be a different person than you were five years ago, guys.

And congratulations, pat yourself on the back. If you're killing it, good for you. Good for you. You absolutely earned it. You absolutely earned and deserve to be where you are at today. And you earn and deserve where you are going to be tomorrow. Okay? You do. Stop comparing yourself against other people. Is it great to aspire?

Absolutely. But aspire to something that is you. Authentic to you. Okay? Who cares? Who cares about what other people are doing? You know, you don't know how they got there. You don't know what they had to lose to get there. You do get to choose what you are going to give to get to where you want to be. You get to compare yourself to you.

And if you do that, you are going to be a happier person. Okay? Believe in yourself. Okay? You have to believe in yourself. A loss does not reflect on you personally. Understand that. Understand that. A loss, whether it be a failure of a business, whether it be a failure of a proposal, whether it be you lost a client, whether it be, you know, heck, maybe you're struggling to meet one of your own personal goals.

Guys, I get it. It's tough. Life is hard. Life is hard. And guess what? There's no winning without some losing too. You can't nail the perfect proposal procedure until you've lost so many proposals that you're like, All right, well, I've lost this many. I know exactly what to do now. I know what people want because I know what they don't want, right?

This is just as relevant for you personally with any of your personal goals. Understand that it doesn't reflect on you. It is a part of the journey. There is no winning without losing first. You can't know the power of a win until you know how shitty it is to be on the other side, to lose. Right? You can't be happy, truly, until you've been sad, truly, because you need that, you need that contrast.

You need that black and white. It's really hard to see something amazing unless you've had something horrible. And so, understand guys, losses are just part of the journey. It doesn't reflect on you personally. As long as you learn something, you've come out ahead. Trust me. As long as you've learned something, you've come out ahead because everything you learn takes you to the next level.

Life happens to us guys and most of the time it works out in your favor. I want you to understand this. Even the crappy things, even the things that in the moment can feel like, Oh, why did that happen? Every time something like that has happened to me, something amazing happened to me too. Something came out of left field that I could have never seen coming.

I talk about that on the show all the time. Business. My business, at least the way it's gone has really come out of left field opportunities, the people I've met, the things that have gone really great for me, typically I didn't see them coming. And I don't think you will either. Some of the best things in life you won't see coming.

You just have to be ready to say yes. You just have to be ready to say, yeah, I'm going to give that a try. Let's see what happens. If you were there to open the door, you were going to be amazed by what walks through it. You would not be who you are today without the circumstances that have led you to the spot you are standing listening to this right now.

Understand that. Every single thing that has happened to you, good, bad, ugly, and amazing, has led you to where you are today. Whether you are successful, whether you're an aspiring business owner, whether you're just looking to grow in business development, whatever it is, everything you have done has has led you to this exact moment, listening to this show right now, everything you have done.

So I want you to understand that you are accumulation of everything, not just the wins, not just the losses, everything, everything. And it makes you an amazing individual. It makes you a powerful individual. It makes you a well rounded individual. You could not know or understand the things that you know and understand if you had not done everything you did the way you did it to get today.

So don't. Be ashamed of your past. Don't be ashamed of what's happened, okay? You are who you are because of everything that has happened to you, and who you are is an amazing person. You deserve success, okay? And guys, regardless of whether you believe it or not, whatever you believe, it's okay, I got, I got no qualms.

I believe in a higher power. And I really believe that our higher powers look after us and things happen for a reason. We cannot always see the big picture as to what's going on, but I can tell you in my life, there have been plenty of scenarios where I'm like, why is this not going the way I want it to?

And then looking back a year, two years later and be like, Oh, that's why, because this is flipping amazing. And I could have never ended up on this path had I gone a different direction. So understand. It is completely okay. It is completely okay. Life is happening for you, okay? There are great things happening behind the scenes.

And understand, there is somebody up there. Whatever you believe in, there's somebody looking after you. There's a better path. Things are just going to fall into place for you. They really do. They really do. And understand that if you just believe that things are going to work out in your favor, you will be surprised at how often they do.

You deserve success. You deserve to win. And you can choose to put a positive spin on anything. And you were put on this world to do great things, guys. You were put on this world to do great things. You got this. You got this. I believe in you. Shoutouts this week! Colin Harms, Rodney Lover, Jory Evans, Jeremie L'Heureux, Carmen Leibel, Mario Aguilera, Gary N, Lauren Graff, Vijayan Swaminathan, Chloe Wu, Scott Trobridge, Tatsiana Zametalina, Joseph Uyo, Aaron Haberman, Brandon Fuchs, Amin Samji, Jamar Jones, Troy Montgomery, and Susan Poseika.

Until next time, this has been the Business Development Podcast, and we will catch you on the flip side.

Outro: This has been the Business Development Podcast with Kelly Kennedy. Kelly has 15 years in sales. Sales and business development experience within the Alberta oil and gas industry and founded his own business development firm in 2020.

His passion and his specialization is in customer relationship generation and business development. The show is brought to you by Capital Business Development, your business development specialists. For more, we invite you to the website at www.capitalbd.ca. See you next time on the business development podcast.